The Minute That Its Born It Begins to Die
There's not much left to love
Too tired today to hate,
I feel the empty
I feel the minute of decay
I'm on my way down
I'm on my way down now, i'd like to take you with me
I'm on my way down
The minute that it's born
It begins to die
I'd love to just give in
I'd love to live this lie
I've been to black and back
I've whited out my name
A lack of pain, a lack of hope,
A lack of anything to say,
There's no cure for what is killing me
I'm on my way down
I've looked ahead and saw a world that's dead
I guess that I am too
I'm on my way down now, I'd like to take you with me....
~Marilyn Manson, "Minute of Decay" from "Antichrist Superstar" (1996)
I really like that song. I always listen to it when I feel kinda down. I feel that way now. But it's no big deal, I'll be fine soon. As for my day, I'm sure Kastle will post it. Since I'm lazy, she can do it. Yeah, I'm evil and lazy. Mwahahaha. Love you long time.
*i'm on my way down now, i'd like to take you with me.....*
Saturday, August 02, 2003
Friday, August 01, 2003
You Rang?!
Ahem....you guys called me? Well shiiieeeeet no one told me. SOrry :(. And Latrice, BANGS?!??!. Lorday, I remember I had some mofackin' tunnel bangs goin' on back in the day. Shiiiiiieeet. Well today I went to Graceland Cemetery. I visited my grandparents. I went in the office to ask the lady where my grandfather was because I couldn't find him (he's buried right by Marshall Fields, but I couldn't find Fields' statue). I told the women I was looking for my grandfather and his name. She's like, "are you sure he's buried here?" What kind of question is that. I think I know where my dead relatives are buried. Why the hell would I go there and ask. I was like "Yes, Ive been here before but I don't remember." Like shit what I look too poor to have a relative buried there? Well shiiiiiet my family got several more plots there. (My uncle used to be a grave digger there back in the day.) But I was like, "oh hell no." That's just sad when you get discriminated against in a CEMETERY. Shit, honkey can't get no respect in a frickin' park full of corpses. Other than that it was a pleasant experience. I left some bracelets on my grandpa's headstone. My grandma's ashes are buried w/ him, but her name isn't on the headstone. I told my mom to get it done soon.
OK, enough about dead people. Hmm..plans for the weekend. Saturday I'm going to my lil cousin Steven's bday party. Then Sunday I'm going to see Acumen Nation, which is a FREE SHOW. WHich is right up my alley cuz I'm always broke. Remember folks, I accept any kind of currency or payment. *winks* I'm out. PS. I swear too much in my posts.
*our last grasp fallen away for good now, i know you're sorry...what else is new*
Ahem....you guys called me? Well shiiieeeeet no one told me. SOrry :(. And Latrice, BANGS?!??!. Lorday, I remember I had some mofackin' tunnel bangs goin' on back in the day. Shiiiiiieeet. Well today I went to Graceland Cemetery. I visited my grandparents. I went in the office to ask the lady where my grandfather was because I couldn't find him (he's buried right by Marshall Fields, but I couldn't find Fields' statue). I told the women I was looking for my grandfather and his name. She's like, "are you sure he's buried here?" What kind of question is that. I think I know where my dead relatives are buried. Why the hell would I go there and ask. I was like "Yes, Ive been here before but I don't remember." Like shit what I look too poor to have a relative buried there? Well shiiiiiet my family got several more plots there. (My uncle used to be a grave digger there back in the day.) But I was like, "oh hell no." That's just sad when you get discriminated against in a CEMETERY. Shit, honkey can't get no respect in a frickin' park full of corpses. Other than that it was a pleasant experience. I left some bracelets on my grandpa's headstone. My grandma's ashes are buried w/ him, but her name isn't on the headstone. I told my mom to get it done soon.
OK, enough about dead people. Hmm..plans for the weekend. Saturday I'm going to my lil cousin Steven's bday party. Then Sunday I'm going to see Acumen Nation, which is a FREE SHOW. WHich is right up my alley cuz I'm always broke. Remember folks, I accept any kind of currency or payment. *winks* I'm out. PS. I swear too much in my posts.
*our last grasp fallen away for good now, i know you're sorry...what else is new*
Thursday, July 31, 2003
What do you get when you mix, a pop tart, laziness and reruns?
You get my day. Well, whatever. Hey honky, what's going on? What about your other friends? People try calling you and you never call them back...damn you!!! Hmm...lets see, well today I spent the day as I pretty much do everyday...I wake up, I lounge around, I make plans for world domination, I clean the house, I feed the pooch and I watch some telly. Well I guess that pretty much sums up my day I guess...oh, I had an interesting conversation with short stuff, that, sadly enough was the highlight of my day. It's okay, it gives me some time to start researching the colleges I want to go to more. I have three choices, well sorta like four...one in chi-town, one in some other part of Illinois, another in New York, and another very faboo and posh one all the way in London!!! Woohoo...hopefully I get accepted there...that would be majorly awesome. well, I shall talk to you guys laterz.
Hasta Luego~Jenny Kastle~
You get my day. Well, whatever. Hey honky, what's going on? What about your other friends? People try calling you and you never call them back...damn you!!! Hmm...lets see, well today I spent the day as I pretty much do everyday...I wake up, I lounge around, I make plans for world domination, I clean the house, I feed the pooch and I watch some telly. Well I guess that pretty much sums up my day I guess...oh, I had an interesting conversation with short stuff, that, sadly enough was the highlight of my day. It's okay, it gives me some time to start researching the colleges I want to go to more. I have three choices, well sorta like four...one in chi-town, one in some other part of Illinois, another in New York, and another very faboo and posh one all the way in London!!! Woohoo...hopefully I get accepted there...that would be majorly awesome. well, I shall talk to you guys laterz.
Hasta Luego~Jenny Kastle~
Wednesday, July 30, 2003
Warm Black Cherry Cola From Aldi's
Aww man a pow wow! I wanna go... And Melissa, thanks for totally leaving me outta that list. And I also wanna say oh lorday...and I know you're gonna say "shuuuuuuuuuuuuut uuuup!" LORDAY!
By the way I'm at Jenny's house now. I'm sleeping over. I'll write more tomorrow.
*there's not much left to lose, to tired today to hate, i feel the empty, i feel the minute of decay, im on my way down now i'ds like to take you with im on my way down....*
Aww man a pow wow! I wanna go... And Melissa, thanks for totally leaving me outta that list. And I also wanna say oh lorday...and I know you're gonna say "shuuuuuuuuuuuuut uuuup!" LORDAY!
By the way I'm at Jenny's house now. I'm sleeping over. I'll write more tomorrow.
*there's not much left to lose, to tired today to hate, i feel the empty, i feel the minute of decay, im on my way down now i'ds like to take you with im on my way down....*
Tuesday, July 29, 2003
Hey, guys. I know it's late and I definitely have to get to bed soon but I just wanted to tell you all that I got the job! yay! thank you so much lana, I owe you one. I gotta get you something now......I am going camping this weekend in Wisconsin and my bro is gonna come with us. It's for the menominee pow-wow. it's gonna be my bro's first pow-wow. okay well i really have to go so that I can get my proper rest for tomorrow's day. oh yeah, and if you are reading this, will, que paso? i didn't see you at the place. maybe we'll catch up next time. until then.......peace.
Monday, July 28, 2003
I Want My $12,000 and Then Some
Hey again. I got another letter today from the Child Support agency saying they served my father again. (Note: he has been living in California for about 7 or 8 years? I don't even remember. I haven't seen him in about 8 years I think. He never pays child support. He lives in a trailor park w/ his mom. Damn, I hate him) Since he finally got a job (bum!) they served papers to him and his employer saying that money is supposed to be taken out of his paycheck and given to me. He's supposed to pay me $150 a month until my 18th birthday, April 26, 2004 ( I know that asshole's been waiting out for that). Plus delinquency payments (backed up support over 12,000). But he has to pay all the money he already owes me til he pays it all off. I just hope he finally gets thrown in jail if I don't get the money. And it's not exactly about the money. It's the support. My mom's always had to take care of us. We're half his too. She told him over 10 years ago that he could either pay child support, or visit us on the weekends and take us out..be a father...but he rarely ever visited us. Once inawhile he's pick us up, and we'd take the bus back to one of his crusty apartments in Uptown. I don't really count that as being a father. And he rarely paid child support. I just hate when fathers do that. If you're going to knock up a woman, have the decency to take care of YOUR child. Even if you can't stay w/ them, pay child support. Shit, people need to own up to things. It bothers me he doesn't give a shit about me, it bothers me he never wanted me, it bothers me he was never there, and it bothers me I have his DNA. But what bothers me the most is he never took any responsibility. He's got 2 kids in Chicago and one in Tennesse or something and he doesn't take care of any of us. He's living off his mom in California and just got a job. While there are people all around the world working and trying to support their families. I hate it. It's not fair that some people can fuck up other people's lives and just run away somewhere else and kick back and relax. Erg...
+MEH, I'll get over.....I have been for the past 14 years, MEH+
*how could you just close off your eyes, turn tail and run, YOU ARE THE GREATEST COWARD*
Hey again. I got another letter today from the Child Support agency saying they served my father again. (Note: he has been living in California for about 7 or 8 years? I don't even remember. I haven't seen him in about 8 years I think. He never pays child support. He lives in a trailor park w/ his mom. Damn, I hate him) Since he finally got a job (bum!) they served papers to him and his employer saying that money is supposed to be taken out of his paycheck and given to me. He's supposed to pay me $150 a month until my 18th birthday, April 26, 2004 ( I know that asshole's been waiting out for that). Plus delinquency payments (backed up support over 12,000). But he has to pay all the money he already owes me til he pays it all off. I just hope he finally gets thrown in jail if I don't get the money. And it's not exactly about the money. It's the support. My mom's always had to take care of us. We're half his too. She told him over 10 years ago that he could either pay child support, or visit us on the weekends and take us out..be a father...but he rarely ever visited us. Once inawhile he's pick us up, and we'd take the bus back to one of his crusty apartments in Uptown. I don't really count that as being a father. And he rarely paid child support. I just hate when fathers do that. If you're going to knock up a woman, have the decency to take care of YOUR child. Even if you can't stay w/ them, pay child support. Shit, people need to own up to things. It bothers me he doesn't give a shit about me, it bothers me he never wanted me, it bothers me he was never there, and it bothers me I have his DNA. But what bothers me the most is he never took any responsibility. He's got 2 kids in Chicago and one in Tennesse or something and he doesn't take care of any of us. He's living off his mom in California and just got a job. While there are people all around the world working and trying to support their families. I hate it. It's not fair that some people can fuck up other people's lives and just run away somewhere else and kick back and relax. Erg...
+MEH, I'll get over.....I have been for the past 14 years, MEH+
*how could you just close off your eyes, turn tail and run, YOU ARE THE GREATEST COWARD*
BORED, BORED, BORED, BORED, BORED!!!!!
Good lord am I bored out of my mind!!!! Today I woke up at the crack of noon, I then layed around until I finally decided to get up and clean. I cleaned downstairs and fed the pooch. I then fed myself cuz we had leftover tamales that we made on saturday, which might I add are the best tamales out there. by the by, that is not only my biased opinion, but the opinion of everyone who has ever tasted them. Anywho...I'm so bored...meh...lol that was for you Honks. well then I'm going out tomorrow so hopefully I have something interesting to post. oh, yeah, everyone must go buy their converse now, and get the classics before nike mess them up! Megan and I are going converse hunting sometime soon when I get some more moneys. well I must go now...nitey nite.
~KASTLE~
Good lord am I bored out of my mind!!!! Today I woke up at the crack of noon, I then layed around until I finally decided to get up and clean. I cleaned downstairs and fed the pooch. I then fed myself cuz we had leftover tamales that we made on saturday, which might I add are the best tamales out there. by the by, that is not only my biased opinion, but the opinion of everyone who has ever tasted them. Anywho...I'm so bored...meh...lol that was for you Honks. well then I'm going out tomorrow so hopefully I have something interesting to post. oh, yeah, everyone must go buy their converse now, and get the classics before nike mess them up! Megan and I are going converse hunting sometime soon when I get some more moneys. well I must go now...nitey nite.
~KASTLE~
GIDDY UP!!
Hey there. Where? THERE. In other news, I'd like to inform you that the Acumen Nation show Aug. 3 at the Metro is free. How ever I have discovered that 2 of the bands playing that night are of the POP PUNK genre. Boy that sucks. But why the hell would a couple of pop punk bands be playing with a kick ass industrial-metal band? I just don't know. The other 3 bands playing that night I am unsure about. It just irks me!
In otherer news, I updated my site. I changed the format. Unfortunately I couldn't make all the changed I wanted because my internet kept freezing when I'd try to do them. So it looks a bit plain for now.
I'd like to note: I AM STILL UNEMPLOYED. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEND ME MONEY, I EXCEPT CASH, COD (THAT'S CASH ON DELIVERY FOR YA'LL WHO DON'T KNOW), MONEY ORDERS, AND ANY SORT OF CHECKS. If you have a credit card, don't feel left out, you can just buy me things I need and then charge it. MMMM KAY? Or maybe if you just want to hire me, that's nice too. Thank you all and GOD BLESS!!!!!!!!!
*if you peddle anethesia for the evil won't you give me some...escalation i'll be right out after i kill this girl's smile for fun*
Hey there. Where? THERE. In other news, I'd like to inform you that the Acumen Nation show Aug. 3 at the Metro is free. How ever I have discovered that 2 of the bands playing that night are of the POP PUNK genre. Boy that sucks. But why the hell would a couple of pop punk bands be playing with a kick ass industrial-metal band? I just don't know. The other 3 bands playing that night I am unsure about. It just irks me!
In otherer news, I updated my site. I changed the format. Unfortunately I couldn't make all the changed I wanted because my internet kept freezing when I'd try to do them. So it looks a bit plain for now.
I'd like to note: I AM STILL UNEMPLOYED. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEND ME MONEY, I EXCEPT CASH, COD (THAT'S CASH ON DELIVERY FOR YA'LL WHO DON'T KNOW), MONEY ORDERS, AND ANY SORT OF CHECKS. If you have a credit card, don't feel left out, you can just buy me things I need and then charge it. MMMM KAY? Or maybe if you just want to hire me, that's nice too. Thank you all and GOD BLESS!!!!!!!!!
*if you peddle anethesia for the evil won't you give me some...escalation i'll be right out after i kill this girl's smile for fun*
Sunday, July 27, 2003
"No those aren't even hooker shoes, they're transvestite shoes."
Hey there. I got my shoes from ebay. They're 6 inches tall. They're so awesome. I made the mistake of showing them to my mom. She told me to return them and not wear them. Oh well, I'm keeping them. Mwahahahahaha
Today was fun. I went to Jenny's. Then we went to Baskin RObbins and then Hollywood Video. Then we watched some of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Then We went to Yanina's. Then back to Jenny's then back to Yanina's. We watched Dracula, it kicked ass. Then I got home at 11:45. Good times. Hmmm...I'm not too sure what to write about. I feel lazy now. Oh yea, Scott's going to Wisconsin for a week. I'll miss him. I wanna visit him when he comes back. Anyone interested in joining me!?
*i never loved you anyway, but i guess i don't care anymore*
Hey there. I got my shoes from ebay. They're 6 inches tall. They're so awesome. I made the mistake of showing them to my mom. She told me to return them and not wear them. Oh well, I'm keeping them. Mwahahahahaha
Today was fun. I went to Jenny's. Then we went to Baskin RObbins and then Hollywood Video. Then we watched some of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Then We went to Yanina's. Then back to Jenny's then back to Yanina's. We watched Dracula, it kicked ass. Then I got home at 11:45. Good times. Hmmm...I'm not too sure what to write about. I feel lazy now. Oh yea, Scott's going to Wisconsin for a week. I'll miss him. I wanna visit him when he comes back. Anyone interested in joining me!?
*i never loved you anyway, but i guess i don't care anymore*
If anyone wants to apply at the new target opening up on Sacramento and Addison the number is 877-479-7131. yeah. i have an interview on tuesday. yeah that's right! kITTY'S GOT AN INTERVIEW! kITTY'S GOT AN INTERVIEW! Okay, well it's late and my friend is ragging on this dude i'm 'talking to'. I don't know whether i should listen to him because he's saying some pretty nasty things. some of you know who he's talking about.... yeah, its mr. cutie pie. Anyway, my eyes are about to go out on me. i'll talk to you guys later. sry i didn't have anything much interesting to say